Holiday Stress, Unrealistic ExpectationsI LOVE the holidays!! I love decorating, cooking cold weather foods (even if cold is 68), attending children’s events and giving gifts! So many things to look forward to! So many perfect memories! SCREECH! Welcome to the season of unrealistic expectations.

Most of us have experienced at least one holiday that wasn’t what we’d hoped for. We have this Norman Rockwell vision of what our meal will look like and then the turkey doesn’t defrost in time or the kids break mom’s favorite crystal. Oh so may things can happen on these special days. So here’s a thought; when you are going to drive in LA on a Friday afternoon at 5pm, you KNOW there will be traffic. You plan for it. You leave extra time to get where you need to go and play your favorite music. You settle in for what you know is coming. You can’t control the traffic but, you can control how you handle it. The holidays aren’t much different. Just remember; your kids are watching…

I remember when my son was 3. He was just learning about opening presents and was very tentative. It took forever to open one gift. So, we “brilliantly” taught him to tear that paper off with gusto and move on to the next gift. We had to get to breakfast eventually! Fast forward 2 years; now he’s opening them (just the way we taught him) by tearing the paper off in seconds and barely looking at the gift before tossing it away to move on to the next. “Take your time honey, we want you to appreciate your gifts!”. Huh? Slightly confusing message for a child. So, when you think about what your expectations are during this time of year, also think about how you’re teaching your children about their own expectations. Allow a little wiggle room for their behavior and guide them through your example. Prepare for the ups and downs of this hectic, happy season and I know you’ll get the precious moments you’re hoping for, just maybe when you least expect them.

Authored by: Michele Pullo

Michele Pullo created happycalmchild out of the needs of her own family and friends to have simple, tangible tools to help our children self-regulate their emotions, focus and ease anxiety. She works with both children and their parents through live and virtual classes, talks, webinars, family workshops and a private family program. She’s combined evidence based stress reduction tools with effective parenting techniques to give parents the support they need. Her experience as the mother of a 9yr old with ADD and a spirited 4yr old keeps her in the trenches with you! Michele’s background working with children, teaching Yoga and Dance along with 25 years of study on Stress Reduction Techniques, Movement for Learning and the Mind/Body Connection helped her create a structured, easy to follow, fun curriculum that gives kids the tools they need while giving parents the results and support they’ve been looking for!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *