Don’t say this to a Single Mom’s Kids

Don’t say this to a Single Mom’s Kids

Single Parent, Awkward questions, divorceIt seems that today there is no filter on other people’s proclivity to know what’s going on in your personal life. I know, we live in a Kardashian world. The fall-out from this type of reality TV comes with people feeling like every single mom’s life is an open book. And our kids fair game for asking a variety of really awkwardly personal questions. It’s not. Here are 5 things not to say to a single mom’s kids.

1. “Where’s your dad?”
A little kid might tell you he’s at work or at home. A recalcitrant teen could answer with “banging his new girlfriend.” Either way, you’re not going to get a detailed retelling of her parent’s messy break-up.

2. “It must be so hard without a daddy.”
Give them a break. Everyone is doing the best they can. Besides, what kind of response are you actually looking for when you confront a child with a statement like that? It’s a judgment and kids can feel that.

3. “What’s your family like?”
Really?! Our family is just like yours. Except daddy’s dirty socks aren’t all over the floor. A recent Pew study highlighted that more and more of the US population finds a variety of social groupings under one roof “a family.”

4. “Do you have friends at school?”
There is an assumption that children are instructed to stay away from single parent kids for fear that they may catch it. Divorce is not contagious.

5. “Your mom is hot”
Kids rarely see their mom like you do. She is the woman who drops them off at school, helps with homework, feeds them dinner and puts them to bed. Don’t hit up the kids for dates, children are not a dating service.

Have your kids been asked awkward or uncomfortable questions? Share them with me at www.kerrizane.com.

Authored by: Kerri Zane

Kerri is an Emmy award winning television executive producer, healthy living expert, single mom advisor, speaker, and author of “It Takes All 5: A Single Mom’s Guide to Finding the REAL One.” published by Morgan James, (November 2012). She is the family travel expert for Peter Greenberg Online, a regular contributor to What’s Up For Kids as well as various mommy blogs. Visit her website at www.kerrizane.com.

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