In the future, all financial transactions will occur via thought processes, similar to Obamacare, a real fiduciary figment of imagination. With that political bomb off my chest, there are still times when people have to write good old-fashioned checks. Unlike our government, some people even have the funds to cover them…ooops, another p-bomb!
With school starting up again, I “paid to the order” quite a few times to ensure our kids were fiscally solvent, and Dodd-Frank compliant, for the academic year…I need an intervention, don’t I?
The upside was that I had the opportunity to teach our daughter how to bounce, uh write, a check! Not without some consternation of course.
“You’re gonna have to do this yourself,” I said, handing her a signed check as I dropped her off in front of the gymnasium. I needed to get home for a web conference.
“WHAT! DAD! WHY DO I HAVE TO DO IT!???”
Can you believe it!? I was handing a female a signed, blank check and she was upset with me.
“Just fill in the dollar amount here in numbers and write the dollar amount in words here. It’s simple! AND DON’T LOSE IT!”
“DAD!” Tears were imminent. Generally, I indulge in more psychological exploration than Maslow, Jung and Freud, but this time I played hardball.
“HEY DUDE! If you can’t do this then say goodbye to the allowance, bike and phone. It’s time to grow up a little, you got it!” It wasn’t quite that bad but you get the idea. I knew I’d made my point because anytime I challenge her like this, my life is in immediate peril. Her tears started to boil on her cheeks. Thankfully she grabbed the check and marched off to the gym instead of ending me behind the wheel of my vehicle. It could have been a “leave the gun, take the cannolis” moment…you Godfather fans out there should know what I’m talking about.
An hour later, with armed protection, I picked her up. Thanks to flock a like-minded 13 year olds, who hadn’t seen each other in a while, the incident was forgotten.
So I’m gonna call this check writing lesson a success…unless she made a ten thousand donation to the middle school on my behalf!