Have you ever wished you had the perfect words to say when your child misbehaved? How many of you have had the experience where you are at the grocery store and your child keeps begging you to buy something, and no matter how many times you explain or say an outright, “NO!” they continue? Wouldn’t you LOVE to have a single phrase that would stop their badgering immediately?
Throughout the years of being a teacher, mother and Stress-Free Parenting Coach to working mothers, I realized that there are some very powerful phrases, when used consistently, that can be extremely effective when parents are trying to get their child to listen to them or get them to stop or start doing something.
If you’ve been feeling frustrated, exhausted or irritated by your children’s behavior lately then you are going to love the following phrases.
Here are 5 very effective phrases that you can use TODAY to see instant results:
Sneaky Phrase #1:
“As soon as you ______ I’ll know you’re ready to ___________.”
As soon as you put your coat on I’ll know you’re ready to go to the park.”
As soon as you tidy up your toys I’ll know you’re ready for some TV time.”
As soon as you get your pajamas on I’ll know you’re ready for a bed time story.”
Sneaky Phrase #2:
“One thing at a time.”
Your child is wiggling, talking, moving, or playing as you try to dress them, brush their teeth, etc. Say:
“One thing at a time, Bobby. Right now we’re brushing your teeth.”
“One thing at a time, Sally. Right now we’re putting on your PJ’s.”
“One thing at a time, Sam. Right now you’re tidying up your playroom.”
Sneaky Phrase #3:
“Try that again because we __________.”
Use this phrase after your child has done something inappropriate such as not looking both ways before crossing the street, slamming a door, or talking rudely.
“Try that again because we always look both ways before we cross the street.”
“Try that again because we always speak politely to each other.”
“Try that again because we always close doors gently.”
Sneaky Phrase #4:
“What do you need to take so ________?”
Use this phrase when you want your child to remember to take something with them. Saying it this way avoids power struggles and lectures and encourages independence and self worth.
“What do you need to take so you don’t get cold today?”
“What do you need to take so you don’t get hungry today?”
“What do you need to take so you don’t get too hot today?”
Sneaky Phrase #5:
“Would you like me to choose or you to choose?”
Use this phrase when you have given a choice and he/she refuses to speak or make a choice. This phrase works like magic! All of a sudden your child sees that you will decide for them and they don’t want that so they quickly make a choice to stay in charge.
Try using these five phrases consistently for a week. You’ll see incredible, fast results. Plus, you’ll be teaching your children your values and rules without being preachy. Nothing will encourage more resistance than being lectured to or belittled. From now on, you’ll simply and calmly say a phrase and then experience the cooperation you so yearned for.